Reassuring My Girlfriend About a Turbulent Friendship Causing Her Anxiety (Message I Sent in February 2016)

If you're STILL worrying about this to this extent....

1. You ACTUALLY feel bad because you are indeed guilty of more than you care to admit, resulting in your desire to apologize and make amends with her.

2. Orrrrrr, you are WRONGLY making yourself THINK you are the one at fault.

And I am VERY much leaning toward you being a victim of the second option, because you OFTEN feel guilty and take the blame for things, even when you shouldn't.

So stop! STOP stressing yourself and taking the blame, when Siena is the one who has been wronging YOU, berating you, treating you unfairly, and ignoring YOU!

If Siena, or ANY of your "friends," habitually mistreat you, he/she/they doesn't deserve your friendship! You are not that desperate and you don't need to stoop that low to accept the friendship of someone who abuses you! You are better than that, and you deserve better than that!!!!

If she's not willing to give you what you deserve, what EVERY friend deserves, then don't give her the luxury of your friendship and move on with your life.

This reminds me a lot of when you badgered me about my relationship involving [REDACTED]. You told me I shouldn't apologize to her, even when I had a decent reason to do so. But the difference is, in your case, you have NO REASON to apologize. You shouldn't bend over backwards for her friendship, which frankly doesn't seem to be worth that much from the perspective of an outsider (like me)!

Have some self-respect and stand up for yourself, like you've always taught me to do. You've told me a lot about her and have sent me copies of numerous conversations you've had with her. And it's clear to me that you should NOT tolerate such shameless indecency. Neither should you tolerate her being so blatantly rude and standoffish.

Therefore, I ask you to refuse to succumb to her manipulation. Stop enduring her abrasive attitude just because you want to maintain another friendship. If she's not going to offer you the respect you deserve, you should seek out new friends. If she will provide you that common courtesy, then go ahead and reconcile with her. But.... do NOT continue interacting with her, if she keeps supplying this brand of halfhearted friendship characterized by social awkwardness, emotional detachment, and roundabout insults.